If I Could Always Be Here

October 26, 2015 Leave a comment

Island State of Mind: Kohala Coast
    Island State of Mind: Kohala Coast

There are various stories to tell as I peruse my journaling during my vacation in Kona, Hawai’i: parents who cannot unplug from the rest of the world; a playful, incorrigible six-year-old nephew; a second honeymoon for my brother and his wife.  I would be burying the lead if I don’t include the adventures of a single daughter traveling with her retired folks, but that’s for a future book.  For the intents and purposes of this blog, what I’m after in October is how I’ve embraced doing virtually nothing but relaxing and simply being–something a city gal like me has difficulty wrapping her arms, much less her head, around.

In an effort to be more Zen

My effort to be more Zen

The surprise of Hawai’i is how much I love it, much the same way I feel about Paris and Italy.  But my takeaway is tinged with much less sorrow as though I would never see it again.  Only a mindset away, I can be a beach bum anytime I want to get away.  Quite frankly, I could do it for months, years even.  My trip forced me to think how I would want my life to be going forward–no more running on fumes as a result of a protracted daily grind and steady stream of stunning morons and smooth operators that have worn the soul dry.  The outflow, I hope, is the life I am meant to lead–less stress, more serenity, love, humor and fulfillment on every level in the chaos and messiness of reality–the measure of living without regrets.  Then, maybe, just maybe, when retirement eventually arrives, I won’t have to pinch myself as though in a dream to be in this paradise again.

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Some of My Favorite Things

August 31, 2015 Leave a comment

Design in the Every Day: Reclaimed wood from wine barrels

Design in My Favorite Things: Reclaimed wood from wine barrels

Quite frankly, the month of August was about work as I made my foray to architectural writing: dIAmeter blog.  I cannot tell you the lengths I made to pull things together, but I believe in the end, it was well worth it to move to the next level of a rather wonderful life.

Architecture and Java: Like Blue Bottle Coffee

 

 

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Return to Me

July 4, 2015 Leave a comment

Reborn on the 4th of July

Reborn on the 4th of July

I was catching up on my Marvel Comics movies that included Captain America and finally saw the last “Iron Man” installation with Robert Downey, Jr.  Much to my surprise, I related to his panic attacks and anxiety after, I’m assuming, his adventures with the superheroes of S.H.I.E.L.D.  But the line that resonated with me was when he turned to an ex-lover to say, “At least, in the mornings I wake up to a person … with a soul.
The first half of the year, I was meeting men who were more or less soul-less.  With a month in mid-way through the year, I made it the cutting-off point to aim higher.  One of them even told me I was looking for Superman.  Quite frankly, my retort is why the hell not?  The Man of Steel at his core stood for truth, justice and the American Way.  Like Iron Man, he was still at work in progress.
Back to placid waters
Back to placid waters
So I am once again returning to me, armed with more experience and the wisdom of formerly divorced women friends whose advice is to slow down and have patience.  I must keep a sense of humor, fill my mind with more positive thoughts and–never mind the destination–be and enjoy the journey.

 

 

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Doing Good

June 29, 2015 Leave a comment

Time to Take Flight in the Second Half of 2015

Time to Take Flight in the Second Half of 2015 (in Lolo Cevicheria in the Mission)

I used to write often, but now other things have taken precedence, for instance, self-improvement and catching up financially after the Great Recession.  But it doesn’t mean I’m not fulfilling my purpose in my life.  I’m where I’m supposed to be, and for a change, it feels good.  It feels right.  Often connecting to this energy takes plenty of effort.  However, there are moments when it’s easy-peasy, when I’m in the right place at the right time.

I went to an art show early this month for the nonprofit Swords to Plowshares and bumped into my old boss, its executiveIMG_3374 director.  Meeting him after a few years was meaningful in a way I didn’t expect in the sense that I could and should perhaps think about giving some of my time to a good cause.  I’m not sure what that is just yet, however, I imagine there are a slew of them needing my skills and experience gratis.

So this is the mindset coming out of a moment that saw the Golden State Warriors pull out Game 4 in the NBA Finals and eventually win the title after 40 years.  As I separate from the first half of the year, new and interesting avenues are opening up for me to explore and once again move forward.

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Book of the Month

May 26, 2015 2 Comments

Scan_20150524 (3)I finished reading a book not too long ago that resonated with me during a time I needed some guidance in my alone-ness.  I wished the story would never end, but of course, it had to.  One line that spoke to me: Sometimes our desires don’t always align with our intentions.  Bringing them together is often a challenge, which is what I encountered during this dating process.  In search of the person with whom I would be most comfortable being, this time in my life I really want to get it right, perhaps the reason why I keep chipping away at it until someone like Michelangelo’s “David” suddenly appears.
As the month wore on, I realized my desires and intentions are most in line when I am single and to some extent whenever I’m with my family and friends.  I returned to conversations I used to have with an old friend, who told me the man she would be with would have to fit into her life.  She eventually met him and enjoying a life with him.  So there’s hope after all, but in the meantime I’m savoring mine alone, whether it’s being more engaged with work I’m passionate about, hanging out with friends and family or simply taking care of myself as best as I know how.   And there’s never ever anything wrong with that.

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Cold Light of Day

April 29, 2015 Leave a comment

Life Is WeirdIn the cold light of day, a situation that once brought pleasure but now disturbs, leads to a moment of clarity, giving way to comfort in that clear-eyed view.

I must say at this point in my life, I arrive to certain conclusions more swiftly, largely due to experience and more knowledge and ways to access it than I could at times bear.

But this is living, which I have to accept, and I have to learn or discover the joy inside of it.  Or as Sarah Ban Breathnach wrote on this day in Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy: “There’s certainly enough mystery to ponder–such as the mystery of what will happen next.  But instead of worrying or obsessing, you decide to just let go and see what occurs.  You choose to take joy in your real life as it unfolds day by day, hour by hour, a heartbeat at a time. …” Well said.

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Spring Awakening

March 31, 2015 Leave a comment

A month of transformation and rooftop Happy Hours at the San Francisco Art Institute and El Techo de Lolinda in the Mission.

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Terence Is My Soul Mate

January 31, 2015 Leave a comment

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A crisis in faith requires more than one spiritual solution.  A sense of humor often is the antidote, like the Angry Birds party favor my nephew Finn once gave his guests at his birthday party.  This week it cheered me up to no end.  All told, this must have been the kindest, most generous January I’ve ever had.

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Peaceful Recognition

December 30, 2014 Leave a comment

Take this snapshot because it’s not everyday that I feel anything like contentment.  To arrive to this place at the end of the year is a surprise, yet, I suppose, was perhaps the whole point of 2014, which was rife with spiritual growth.  The landing was a little rough, however, I made it all in one piece.  And nowadays that counts for something.

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Take-off from Sea-Tac Airport on a trip to Seattle this year.

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Budding Romances

November 30, 2014 Leave a comment

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Two Blossoms in a Shallow Pond: No More Frogs!

I often come home too exhausted to start the second shift of anything.  As the year grinds toward the finish line, living supersedes writing.  So if I miss a month, it’s not the end of the world.  Like being partner-less for the moment,  I’ll live.

In the dating department, it is a re-ignition of sorts.  I recently jump-started online dating that I dropped seven years ago.  After hearing personal success stories, I thought it might be the right time to jump back into the pool.  For one profile, I wrote a manifesto, if you will, of what I’m looking for, that, quite frankly, no one really reads.  But it seems the process needs to take over in order to find one’s match–as a friend warned me, I would have to kiss more frogs than I would care to.  And he couldn’t have been more right.

But I can’t give up, as a fellow traveler advised me this year when waiting for our flights in the Virgin America terminal of SFO.  She stuck with it for two years and was going on three dates a week before she met her current fiance.  Really, that is the lesson for most anything.  I should keep sowing the seeds, and before I know it, a beautiful flower, just like the blossoms that unexpectedly popped out of my gardenia plant this Fall, will emerge.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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